Last night at a small group for couples, we discussed the ever-challenging issue in the book of James about "taming the tongue." One of the analogies in the third chapter, about our speech, is of a channel through which salt water and fresh water cannot both flow. And yet, in OUR day-to-day lives, we rarely make an effort to dam up the salt water from coming through in our speech.
We talked about the power of words, good and bad -- how well we remember the kindest thing anyone ever said to us, as well as the most damaging. We also talked about sarcasm, which I think may be the "nice" person's brand of meanness (masking insults with sharp comments that are funnier than saying "you're a complete idiot," but carry pretty much the same message).
When you get right down to it, I guess the best question to ask yourself before opening your big trap is, "what is the point of this comment?" If there's nothing productive that could come of it and it clearly doesn't build someone up, there is no reason to keep talking.
The salt water thing is going to stick with me for awhile. My husband and I think the phrase "saltwater speech" will be a good, UNself-righteous thing to say when keeping each other accountable with our words. I want to be a freshwater fish!
About Me
- Lois E. Lane
- Flying by the seat of my pants, playing by heart, cooking with no recipe — just a full-time wife and mommy masquerading as a part-time writer. In no particular order, my favorite things are my husband, Jesus, my baby, morning tea, green, my wonderful family, words, my iTunes "Autumn Thoughts" mix, good journalism, theology, and the idea of sitting down to read.
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2 comments:
Well stated, yet again Lois. I agree whole heartedly. There is far too much "fun" that is had at the expense of other people. Most of what we say (I'm sad to reflect) does not edify. I get caught up sometimes by being too concerned about what is coming out of other mouths. It's too easy of a thing for me to judge the sarcasm that people use and then I fall into the trap of self righteosness. Not only that but I am also a perpetrator of "salty" speech myself. This salt, however, should not be confused with the idea of being salt and light to the world. Thinking of it in terms of animals is good so as not to be confused... I want to be a freshwater fish too!
The tongue is so hard to tame. And once your word is out, it's out.
Not that'd I'd know. I've heard.
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