Die-hard? No. Smarter than a hammer? Yes

I have watched only one episode of "American Idol" this season, and that was because my mother-in-law was in town and she never misses it. In the past I have been a bit of a fan because I like listening to good music, plain and simple. I can take or leave all the hyped-up junk that comes with it. Be that as it may, I could not bring myself to watch yet another season of the show, which more often than not gets it wrong (actually, the voters get it wrong but "American Idol" is the vehicle for their poor judgment and my frustration).

Even after one show, I'm keen enough to know the wrong guy with weird hair got booted last night.

No, I'm not going to say the name of the androgynous-looking, vocal chops-deficient boy who didn't even make it into the bottom three ... he is EVERYWHERE right now. Which is probably why people can't stop voting for him, however undeserving. But the one time I saw Chris Sligh perform, I liked him. He reminded me of a lot of the talented guys I sang with in high school choir. Plus, he covered D.C. Talk once and that didn't hurt my soft spot for him.

Anyway, in the immortal words of Forrest Gump, "that's all I have to say about that." And with any luck -- knock on wood -- there'll be no cause for me to muck up my personal plot of cyberspace again with "AI" nonsense.

Thomas the Tank Engine and one of life's great pleasures

If you've never taken the time to let a 3-year-old tell you a story about trains, you really should.

Last weekend, W (the nephew, not the president) entertained me with a delightful bed-time tale about Thomas and Gordon on a special mission for Sir Toppenhat to deliver delicious beverages. Usually it's a member of the W fan club/family who does the story telling, but that night was a restless one and I think the boy would have told me a story about anything to stay "up" for a few minutes more.

And this boy is particularly bright (a first born of two first borns, surprise surprise). I listened intently as a sudden cargo spill left orange juice and hot chocolate all over the tracks. Can you imagine something more amusing in the mind of a young boy? I was impressed at W's train of thought (no pun intended) for a 3 year old -- chronological and completely practical.

He even thought to include a third engine in his story, an engine I had chosen out of all of them to play with just an hour before. It's not one of his favorite engines by a long shot, so I know this inclusion was meant purely for me, which I found quite thoughtful. Of course I can't remember the name of this train, but it's not the narrative details of the story I'll remember.

The parts worth remembering were his eyes growing larger upon description of the chocolate-covered tracks and his excited stuttering at a plot progressing in supremely silly ways. There is a "feel" to a night like this that's hard to put into words. It involves a child's small, outstretched fingers, moonlight, soft breathing, and virtual silence every place in the world except right where you are. It aches a little to leave a moment like that, but you walk away sighing with a 60-minute smile (at least) stuck on your face. If you don't believe me, try it some time.

"They will not be the same next time. The sayings
so cute, just slightly off, will be corrected.
Their eyes will be more skeptical, plugged in
the more securely to the worldly buzz
of television, alphabet, and street talk,
culture polluting their gazes' dawn blue.
It makes you see at last the value of
those boring aunts and neighbors (their smells
of summer sweat and cigarettes, their faces
like shapes of sky between shade-giving leaves)
who knew you from the start, when you were zero,
cooing their nothings before you could be bored
or knew a name, not even your own, or how
this world brave with hellos turns all goodbye."
-John Updike

Ho-hum

My knowledge of the cartoon "South Park" is limited to what I read in headlines and a few scenes I've caught over the years. I do know that shock value is paramount to its creators, even if it means sacrificing cleverness or originality at times.

Last week's show apparently featured more than 40 uses of the "n-word." And a lot of viewers applauded the episode.

I'm sure there's some great moment of satire I don't know about (because I didn't and won't watch it), but still -- hasn't that card been played by "South Park's" creators about a thousand times? You know, the gag where they take some pop-culture controversy and beat it to death?

Yes, it may have been funny and even insightful, but should this show still be making headlines after 11 years when there really are no new tricks up its sleeve?

Um ... what?

In this story, sent to me by one beloved aunt, a woman is suing doctors and Planned Parenthood for a failed abortion. She wants help with child-rearing costs. Yes, I understand she paid for a "service" that wasn't properly performed, but I've got some questions here: For how many years of child rearing would these folks be paying? And, more importantly, why do people always seem to forget about adoption?

The reason the 45-year-old woman gave for terminating her pregnancy was not rape and not for her own health; she did not have enough money to raise a child. So, who was forcing this woman to raise the baby to begin with, or who is forcing her to raise the child now? Again I'm befuddled by the only TWO options there seem to be for unwanted pregnancies on TV and now in the real world -- raise the child or abort it. There is yet another option in which more parties win. Or maybe there's something I'm just not getting...

Go!

Go see "Amazing Grace."

. . .

Why are you still sitting there?

When souls mate

One of the strangest things about marriage is the coexistence of one purpose and two perspectives. Every now and then, I look at my husband and think, "How is it possible that we're clearly two peas in a pod yet couldn't disagree more about [insert topic here]?"

This week we had one of those "difficult" talks, where emotions run high and frustrations even higher. You want so badly for the person who shares your bed, your sink and your car to share your opinion as well. How can we see this so differently when we laugh at all the same things?

These talks are hard, but not having them is harder. Pick your poison: now or later. Either way, take a deep breath and remember it's not the end of the world.

The first 24 hours after a talk such as this feel odd -- even holding hands seems out of place, and eye contact takes effort. But you go to bed, wake up and start the day as usual. "This is my husband, the man I chose and would choose again in a heartbeat."

We don't see eye-to-eye on everything, but thankfully, we walk hand-in-hand through all of it. A refreshing sprinkle of rain to him might be my threatening storm, and the sunshine that irritates his eyes might create an inspiring sunset for me. We won't always view our circumstances and possibilities the same way, but we're there together in the thick of it all.

A song for Valentine's Day 2007

To my valentine:

When the road gets dark
And you can no longer see
Just let my love throw a spark, baby
Have a little faith in me

When the tears you cry
Are all you can believe
Just give these loving arms a try, baby
Have a little faith in me

Have a little faith in me...

When your secret heart
Cannot speak so easily
Come here darlin'
From a whisper start
To have a little faith in me

When your back's against the wall
Just turn around, you will see
I will catch ya, I will catch your fall
Just have a little faith in me

Have a little faith in me...

Well, Ive been loving you for such a long, long time baby
Expecting nothing in return
Just for you to have a little faith in me
You see time, time is our friend
Cause for us there is no end
All you gotta do is have a little faith in me
I said I will hold you up, I will hold you up
Your strength gives me enough
So have a little faith in me

All ya gotta do is have a little faith in me...

(John Hiatt)

You know it's a sad day for pop culture when...

...these are your headlines:
" 'Norbit' rules box office with $33M debut"
"Chicks rule the Grammys"

The "Norbit" comment speaks for itself, one would think, but as for the Grammys please don't misunderstand -- the Dixie Chicks are very talented musicians. Was "The Long Way" worth five statues? Negatory. Last week, experts were predicting a Chick-littered awards show because it was the music industry's year to "make a statement."

I don't know about you, but I'm not sure I'd want to win a Grammy Award out of principle. I would want to win because I'm the best of the bunch. How many of us can name another song off the Chicks' album aside from "Not Ready to Make Nice"? And yet it won the ALBUM category. This CD was not that critically acclaimed, you must remember -- certainly not like fellow nominee "Futuresex/Lovesounds."

It's insulting, really, the more you think about it. The Grammys are supposed to be apolitical when compared to the Oscars. Just as insulting was the completely over-the-top introduction of the Chicks' performance, in which "brave" was the least-superfluous adjective used to describe them. Their one popular single from the recent release is a big "up yours" to anyone who dismissed them after they declared in a foreign country how ashamed they were of President Bush (wow ... bravery indeed ... wonder why that sentiment didn't come up in their Houston concert?).

Whether it was stupid of them to make those statements all that time ago is neither here nor there. What you need to remember is that the Chicks lost their fan base, and what made them buzz-worthy again was a bitter, self-indulgent political statement. This Grammy recognition will likely be the Dixie Chicks' swan song. Propped up as anti-war symbols by music industry puppeteers, and with few original, loyal fans, where can they go from here?

In other news, this commentary on all the Anna Nicole Smith hoopla is one of the few articles actually worth reading.

Just Like Romeo and Juliet

I wouldn't mind being found like this thousands of years from now.

I knew there was another reason I didn't like that movie...

In other "speechless" news, Jessica Simpson recently revealed it was during a viewing of "The Notebook" that she finally decided to file for divorce. "It was about that moment of desperation," she says. "I needed to breathe."

I'm no geography buff, but I do know it's decidedly impossible to be at two places at once. And as Ms. Simpson was rarely WITH her estranged husband during that last year of marriage (what with all those great screen roles and important photo spreads), she was more often than not SEPARATE from hubby Nick Lachey.

Did she need a "breather" from Nick, or from the strain of a marriage in which she rarely saw her soulmate? I really have no light to shed on this. It just sort of struck me and I wondered if it struck anyone else.

Thatta "Girl"

"Because I Said So" is not opening to great reviews from the critics. So I thought this was particularly worth noting:

"Sidelined as the big sis, 'Gilmore Girls' Lauren Graham shows enough spunk to make you wish the movie was about her instead."

Addendum: My-bittersweet-Space

And now a "thank you" to a certain special aunt who took the time to exhort me after my previous post. It is important to remember that circumstances, and often people, are changing constantly in this life. We grow, we move, we experience ... we change. And we have but one Friend who sticks closer than a brother. Thank God for that.

I would do well to be grateful for the relationships I am able to nourish each and every day, knowing full well that humans are imperfect and can at any time let me down. Lord knows I've let others down!

I pray for the grace to live "one day at a time, sweet Jesus" -- mindful of the friends I have, fond of the friends I used to have, and open to the friends I have yet to make.

My-bittersweet-Space

After months and months of resolve, I caved and opened a MySpace account in December. I did so because I was sick of "Googling" old friends to get in touch, but coming up empty-handed. Why I get the itch to make all these contacts is beyond me -- it likely creeps up when I'm feeling insecure about the strength of my "current" friendships, or some such nonsense.

There was an initial rush that came with the ability to contact dozens of people right at my fingertips. I sent out my first greetings, fishing for whatever replies I could get. Reading them was fun and brought a smile to my face. People with whom I hadn't spoken since high school *cough* years ago were right in front of me, telling me how they were. Crazy.

The fairy dust wore off quickly -- and not just because MySpace isn't my bag (the pages are far too busy and I'd much rather be cruising blogs). After a couple weeks as a MySpacer, I became very melancholy. Instead of being entertained by or interested in the adventures of my old buddies as captured in photos, all I saw were lives I was no longer a part of. And it felt like a punch in the gut.

I've always treasured my friendships, and taken it ultra-personally when they deteriorated. A MySpace buddy of mine sent out one of those famous "about you" surveys. One of the questions asked for an odd or little-known fact about me: "I lose friends at about the same rate as I make them," was my reply. Sounds pretty cynical, doesn't it? I know -- I was surprised by it myself. But it's fairly accurate, and more than a little frustrating for someone as "friendly" as I am. I hate it.

Sometimes it seems as if all the significant friendships I have will inevitably turn into MySpace icons ... except my family. It's so nice to have a supremely wonderful group of people in my family who are friends for life. And honestly, at the end of the day, between them and my husband, I don't know if there's much more I could ask for!

Eureka!

I've finally conquered a few of my Blogger demons. After some focused concentration on my part (which isn't easy to muster up after a long day at work), I discovered how to change some of things that needed changing. The next step will be actually posting something of value :)

P.S. Extra credit to whomever can help me get rid of the icky gray in my "posted by" boxes...

The new and unimproved Blogger

It is lame to blog about Blogger ... and shouldn't it mess with the space-time continuum or something? ANYWHO, I made the mistake of getting sucked into the new drag-and-drop template design. It sounded fun in theory, but in practice it has mucho problemo.

I have lost all my "people to see" links. Yes, Blogger handily assured me that my previous template and its information would be saved in case info was lost in the transition -- they just neglected to tell me where. So I worked up the energy to re-find and re-post my precious links, only to find I CAN'T. The "add link" button in my design phase will not work. Goody!

Despite my new hand-picked font and prettiershades of green, I am unsatisfied with this new ability to "drag and drop." For an under-experienced computer person who gets frustrated easily, it's simply not worth it.

That being said, Happy Friday everyone!